Letting Go
by Rebecca Cage
Summary: After the tragic death of Sha're, Jack O'Neill takes time to comfort his best friend when Daniel needs him the most. My first attempt at a one shot so please be kind. Read and review please!


Letting Go

Disclaimer: I do not own Stargate. MGM does. Also, I know this type of story has been done before but I wanted to have a crack at it.

It had been twenty-four hours since it had happened. The absolute worst day in Daniel Jackson's life. The previous day they had freed the Abydonian people from captivity when Daniel had seen Sha're, his beloved wife, standing off to the side. When he went after her, he was attacked by Amaunet, the lover of Apophis and the Goa'uld who had taken over Sha're's body over two years before. Daniel found himself trapped in the grip of a Goa'uld hand device and in terrible pain. However, the pain in his body was nothing compared to the emotional anguish he felt as he lost consciousness.

When Daniel had awakened in the infirmary at the SGC some time later, the first thing that came to his mind when Sam asked him what he remembered was that he had been with Sha're.

"I saw Sha're. She was there." Daniel whispered tiredly. The looks of pain on his friends' faces told him that something just wasn't right. However, nothing could have prepared him for what was he was about to hear. "What?"

"Sha're's dead, Daniel. I'm really sorry." Jack told him sadly.

"How?"

"I am responsible." Teal'c said stoically, avoiding Daniel's pained gaze.

"This can't be true. She should have been taken to a sarcophagus."

"We defeated all of the Goa'uld, Daniel. There was no one to take her." Sam whispered.

"I don't believe this." Daniel whispered.

A few minutes later, Jack and Teal'c had Daniel in a wheelchair and took him down to the morgue so that he could have a chance to say goodbye to Sha're. As the sheet was pulled back and Daniel saw the reality of her death, he felt as if someone were tearing his heart out.

"You should have waited longer and let me try and get through to her." Daniel snapped at Teal'c, the anger in his eyes piercing the Jaffa.

"I only fired my weapon to save your life, Daniel Jackson. I am sorry that Sha're is dead and I regret that you are hurting, but you are my friend and I would do the same if I had to do the situation over again."

Two days later, Daniel had been released from the infirmary and had officially resigned from SG-1. The move worried his friends greatly as this was not like Daniel at all. One evening while he was going through his journals of all the missions he had been on, Daniel was startled by a knock on his apartment door.

"Hey, Jack." Daniel said as he opened the door for his friend, glad for a little company.

"Hi. I'm not interrupting, am I?"

"Not at all. So what brings you by this evening?"

"I was just a little concerned about you. How are you holding up?" Jack admitted as he followed Daniel inside.

"I guess I'm okay. I'm just trying to keep busy to keep my mind off everything that's happened. Would you like a beer?"

"Yeah. Sounds good."

After grabbing two beers out of the refrigerator, Daniel sat next to Jack on his couch and handed him a beer. After all that he had been through and the pain that he was feeling, he really didn't want to be alone. What Daniel didn't know was that Jack had guessed that he would need some company and that was why he had come over.

"I really appreciate you coming over, Jack. I could use some company right about now." Daniel smiled gratefully.

"No problem. I know you'd do the same thing if I were going through the hell that you are right now. So, do you want to talk about it?"

"It's just so hard to believe that this has happened. I can't help but think that there was something more that I could have done to save her. I would have rather died than her or at least died with her so I wouldn't have to hurt like this." Daniel said quietly, his voice cracking with emotion.

"Don't talk like that Daniel. I understand that you're hurting but I just want you to know that you aren't alone. You have friends here to help you and go through this with you. Have you even properly grieved for Sha're? We're just very concerned about you, Daniel."

The compassion of his best friend and the knowledge that he truly wasn't alone was all it took to open the floodgate of suppressed pain and grief. Daniel put his head in his hands as he broke down and cried for the first time since the death of his wife.

"Oh, God, Jack. Why did this have to happen? I loved Sha're so much and all I can think about is that she's gone forever. I couldn't save her. I wish I could forget this whole thing ever happened. I just want to forget." Daniel sobbed, all of his pain pouring from his broken heart.

"I know. It's going to get easier in time, I promise. I'm here, Daniel. I really do understand what you're going through right now." Jack whispered, trying to comfort Daniel as best he could. He reached out and embraced his friend tightly, giving him an avenue for his grief. Daniel wrapped his arms around Jack's waist in return as he continued to sob without apology. Jack was silent as he rocked Daniel gently, letting him cry. He knew that Daniel needed to cry and mourn because Jack had bottled up in the same manner when his son had died.

About twenty minutes later, Daniel's tears had finally subsided and Jack noticed that he had gone limp and his head was lying heavy on his shoulder. A glance at his friend confirmed his suspicions. Daniel's bottled up emotions had finally taken an extreme toll on him and he had cried himself to sleep. Jack carefully got up and maneuvered Daniel to where he was resting on the couch. He gently took Daniel's glasses off, placing them on the table, and covered him with a blanket.

"At least he'll get some rest. I'll bet he hasn't gotten a lot of sleep since Sha're died. Even if he has, he probably hasn't slept all that well. I think I'll just let him sleep for a while." Jack thought, smiling a little as he noticed a distinct peace had spread across Daniel's features as he slept. "Sleep well, Daniel. It'll make you feel better."

Jack stayed with Daniel while he was sleeping, not wanting to leave him alone during this difficult time. Watching over his friend, Jack was glad to see that he didn't seem quite as distressed now and he silently hoped that Daniel would sleep for a long time so as to give himself a break from his pain, a rest for his mind as well as his body.

Thirty minutes later, the phone began ringing in the kitchen. Jack jumped up and ran to answer it before it could wake Daniel. He picked up the receiver breathlessly.

"Hello."

"Colonel? Sorry, sir. I was meaning to call Daniel. I must have dialed the wrong number by mistake." Sam said.

"No you didn't, Carter. You dialed right."

"What are you doing at Daniel's? Why aren't you at home?"

"Well, I came over to check on Daniel a little while ago and he seemed obviously down so I convinced him to talk to me. He couldn't hold it together so he completely broke down and let everything out. He's asleep right now so I'm going to stay with him because I don't think he really needs or wants to be alone right now. Daniel's completely exhausted so I'm going to just let him sleep. That's why I answered the phone, I didn't want it to wake him." Jack explained, casting a glance at Daniel's sleeping form on the couch.

"Poor, Daniel. He's been through hell these past 48 hours. I was actually calling to check on him myself. I wish that he didn't have to go through this. I hate the Goa'uld even more now for what they've done to Daniel." Sam said solemnly, a tinge of fire in her voice.

"So do I, Carter. The only thing we can do now is be here for Daniel and let him know that he's not alone. That he does have someone to lean on. I think that's the best thing for him right now."

"Okay. I'm going to go now, sir. When Daniel wakes up let him know that I called and tell him I'm thinking about him."

"I'll do that. Take it easy, Carter." Jack said, hanging up the phone and heading back into the living room.

It was about 8:30 that evening when Daniel finally woke. He opened his eyes slowly to find Jack kneeling beside the couch.

"Jack? What's going on?" Daniel asked sleepily, blinking slowly in momentary confusion.

"You fell asleep. I decided to hang around because I got the feeling that you don't need to be alone right now. You feel better?"

"A little. I guess it's because I slept for a while. Everything must have finally caught up to me. Jack?"

"Yeah. What's up?"

"Thanks for being here for me. I really appreciate you staying to keep me company and keeping watch over me while I was sleeping. I couldn't have asked for a better friend."

"Anytime, Daniel. I'm always here if you need me. You feel up to eating anything?" Jack smiled, sitting beside Daniel on the couch.

"Actually, I am pretty hungry. Now that you mention it I think I'll make myself a sandwich or something." Daniel said, his stomach rumbling.

"Ah, ah. You stay put. I'll make you something to eat. Just relax, Daniel."

As he sat on his couch, listening to Jack fumbling around in the kitchen, Daniel thought about how lucky he was to have such a loyal friend to watch out for him and to be there to comfort him in a hard time. It meant a lot to him that Jack had come to check on him.

"Here you go, Daniel. I got you a sandwich and some juice." Jack said, handing the food to Daniel and sitting on the couch beside him.

"Thanks a lot, Jack. I can't tell you how much your friendship and support mean to me. Especially right now. I don't think I could get through losing Sha're on my own." Daniel smiled, clapping Jack on the shoulder.

"That's what friends are for. We're all here for you. All you need to do is call, or in the case of tonight, let someone get a feeling that you need one of us."

Jack and Daniel sat there on the couch for a long time as Daniel ate his supper, just keeping each other company. It was then that Daniel realized that he enjoyed having Jack there and he was drawing a great deal of comfort by Jack's presence.

"Well, I think I'm going to head home now and let you get some rest. Call me if you need anything."

"Jack. Can I ask you a favor?"

"Sure. What is it?" Jack asked, although he thought he had a pretty good idea what Daniel wanted.

"Could you hang here with me this evening? I have an extra room and I'm sure I could find a change of clothes for you. I just don't want to be by myself. I don't really trust myself at this point."

"Of course. If you want me to keep you company tonight then I will. To be honest with you it'll make me feel a lot better if I know you're okay. I don't just have a responsibility to my team, my friends, when we go off world."

"Thanks, Jack. What do you say we watch something on television. I think there should be a late baseball game or something coming on right about now." Daniel smiled, visibly relieved as he grabbed the remote control and turned on a baseball game.

When the baseball game wrapped up at about 11:30, Daniel found Jack something to use for pajamas and placed some blankets on the bed in his spare room. He was grateful that Jack was there because he could have confidence in the fact that if anything went wrong, he had a friend there to help out. In fact, it felt more like he had an older brother there, to keep him company and look after him.

"Here we go, Jack. I've got everything all set up for you. Let's both try to get some sleep." Daniel said as he started toward the door.

"Are you sure you'll be able to sleep, Daniel? I mean, you slept for almost four hours earlier." Jack asked, stopping Daniel short.

"Yeah. Actually, Janet gave me something before I left the base to take if I needed it to help me sleep. I think I'll take one of those to put me out for the night. See you in the morning, Jack."

Before heading to his bedroom, Daniel made his way quietly into the kitchen and took a medicine bottle out of the cabinet. He shook out one of the pills Janet had sent with him and swallowed it with a little bit of water.

"There we go. A few more minutes and I'll at least be able to get a good night's sleep." Daniel said to himself, making his way to his bedroom and flopping into bed. It didn't take long for the pill he had taken to begin to affect him and soon his eyes were drooping with sleepiness. As he gently drifted off to sleep, Daniel whispered one final thought. "I love you, Sha're."

Jack lay awake for a little while, thinking about things, particularly all that had transpired over the past days. He found himself wondering how things could go so tragically wrong so quickly.

"I wish I could turn back time and prevent this whole thing from happening. If only I could pull that off then Sha're would still be alive, Daniel and Teal'c wouldn't be at odds and Daniel wouldn't be going through the worst pain that anyone can experience." Jack thought to himself as he settled in and made himself comfortable. A few minutes later, he closed his eyes and dropped off to sleep.

Daniel stirred the next morning from a sound sleep and was greeted by the pleasant smell of coffee brewing in his kitchen. He got out of bed, stretching, and began to get dressed.

"Jack must be awake. I swear that guy can read my mind sometimes. I could really use a cup of coffee right now." Daniel thought as he left his bedroom and headed to the kitchen.

"Morning, Jack."

"Morning, Daniel. You seem to feel a little better this morning. I made a pot of coffee, you want some?" Jack smiled as Daniel sat across from him.

"Yeah. That's exactly what I need. I want to tell you again how much I appreciate you supporting me. It really does help to know that I'm not alone." Daniel said.

"No problem. Actually, I forgot to tell you before but Carter called here last night while you were sleeping. She wanted to check up on you and make sure you were okay."

"Really? That was very nice of her to do. I feel very lucky to have people around who care so much for me." Daniel smiled sadly as the doorbell rang.

"Something tells me that I should go answer than for you. Stay put. I'll be right back." Jack grinned as he leapt off the couch and went to answer the door. "Well, speak of the Devil."

"Sir?" Sam said, slightly confused at having received such a greeting.

"Sorry, Carter. It was just that Daniel and I were just talking about you."

"Jack was telling me that you called last night to see if I was okay. I really appreciate your concern, Sam. It means a lot. So, what brings you by this morning?" Daniel explained from where he sat on the couch as Jack moved from the door and let Sam into the apartment.

"So. Whatcha got there?" Jack asked nonchalantly as he noticed the box in Sam's hands.

"Oh. I figured that you guys wouldn't have eaten breakfast this morning so I brought over some donuts. From what I gather of the evening that transpired here last night, you both could use a good breakfast. Junk food was the best breakfast that I could think of given the circumstances."

"Your timing couldn't have been more perfect, Sam. Jack and I were actually just having some coffee. Can I get you some?"

"Yeah. Thanks, Daniel. That'd be great."

A few minutes later, the three friends were sitting in Daniel's living room having coffee and donuts and spending time together. Togetherness was something that Daniel desperately needed.

"So, Daniel, you seem to be doing a little bit better this morning. I'm glad to see that." Sam smiled, resting her hand on Daniel's arm.

"Thanks, Sam. Actually, I do feel more like myself today. I think it has something to do with the fact that last night Jack helped me get my grief off my chest and after I let it all out in the open, I got a good night's sleep for the first time since Sha're died." Daniel whispered, hugging Sam and smiling at Jack who sat across from them.

"You wanna know something, Danny. This may sound a little strange but for the first time in two days, I honestly believe that you're going to be okay." Jack said.

"So do I, Jack. Oddly enough, so do I."


End file.
